(he knows, he knows. the one time he spoke about his scars, it wasn't chuuya who couldn't bear to see them. it's still some sort of development, however, to rid himself of the bandages to another's eye. even when they shared bodies, the bandages stayed put. medical personnel aside, he has never willingly shown what they hide.
a moment to stare at his own hand, where the wrapping ends and begins, before he sighs. chuuya's seen bits and pieces, but it's been years. even living together doesn't grant him a glimpse. it's worse than he remembers, dazai knows for a fact, but he'll slowly undo the first rolls until the end of his forearm. the cuts are there, some superficial, some deeper than they should, but none fatal, certainly.
just stitch it. he'll remove the others in the bathroom when he needs to bath. he's definitely not looking, though. his eyes fall anywhere else.)
[Chuuya knows. He doesn't think anything under Dazai's bandages could disgust him, or make him view Dazai any differently. But it was Dazai's feelings that were the issue, the thing that truly mattered. While Chuuya was perfectly fine pushing Dazai around and kicking his ass in a multitude of ways, this was one line he'd long ago learned Mattered, and would never cross without permission given.
Dazai's reluctance is obvious, but as he starts to unroll the bandages Chuuya knows he's giving that permission without words. So while he does that Chuuya will reach for the first aid kit in his bag, pulling it out and locating the medical alcohol and some gauze, giving Dazai time to unwrap himself while he gets set with that.] Y'know, did I ever tell you that Ane-san got on my ass for my stitching, once? I knew how to do it before we met, but she told me my technique was garbage when she saw how I did it. She insisted on teaching me how to do it 'neatly'.
[It is worse than he remembers... but Dazai is still breathing, which is a victory in and of itself in Chuuya's opinion. He takes Dazai's arm carefully in hand, running an alcohol soaked piece of gauze over the various cuts, taking extra care with the deeper ones to make sure there's nothing caught in there. There's no taking away the sting, but Chuuya is gentle, and gentler still when he disinfects the needle and sets about stitching. Quickly and carefully. He chatters all the while, first telling Dazai about the 'sewing lessons' he'd gotten from Kouyou that involved cloth rather than skin, including one stupid attempt where he'd managed to sew a pair of gloves together.]
(two things he absolutely despises. pain and his damn skin, so while chuuya busies himself, his brain also makes an effort to travel further and further away from this room.
he can, however, take notice that while chuuya can't stop it from hurting all together, he's doing his best to make it the most comfortable he can for someone so uncomfortable like dazai is right now. the chatter is welcome, and it even draws a snort from him.)
You know, I've always been jealous. She's so elegant. But no, I was stuck with Mori and Elise. Elise has her weird moods. Ugh, ew.
[He's certainly trying his best. Dazai probably needs all the distractions he can get today, after all.]
Ha! I'm pretty sure Kouyou nabbed me up because I didn't have a damn clue about how to talk business and was liable to fuck things up quick without her kind of training. I was the furthest thing from elegant.
[Training a street gang kid into a mafioso was a Job, probably.]
Eh, Elise ain't that bad if you humor her. Not quite sure why an ability wants to eat so many sweets though.
You just look elegant, though, if you squint real hard and have bad taste. And she's very mad at me, last I checked, last we talked.
(because damn, you still talk like a delinquent, chuuya. those r's rolling, the slangs, ah, kyouyou tried her best. there's a moment there he sucks teeth, because fucking hell, it hurts. why didn't he nab morphine from the streets. damn, past dazai.)
I usually just poked her.
(poof. bye, felicia.)
That time I was captured, it felt like nothing had changed at all? I even had small talk with some people. Sato-san's kids are all grown-up now... That long went by, huh?
I can pull off elegant just fine, asshole. Just ‘cause i don’t act like i’m all about business 24/7 doesn’t mean i’m incapable.
[Chuuya lets out a snort at that bit about kouyou though.] Mad? You’re still breathing and you still have all your parts. Not sure what you’re complaining about.
[the word Chuuya would use was ‘heartsick’ personally. Others might not acknowledge it, but Kouyou had chosen to give her blessing for kyouka’s new life in the light. That didn’t mean it didn’t hurt her to see the child she cared so much for go somewhere beyond her reach to find her happiness.]
I’d say i’m disappointed in our security, but it is you. Did he tell you his daughter wants to become a pediatrician? he’ll talk anyone’s ear off about it, the man’s so damn proud.
I'll believe it when I see it, slug. I just see tiny delinquent.
(it's just so much easier to let out the insults, although they're half-hearted, he's not even trying, he's not even looking at chuuya right now. even the hand the moves some hair to tuck behind his ear is instinctual like he just knows where chuuya is, without even needing to look.
the curse. the damn curse.)
Ah, no, he didn't have time. Look at that... That's very nice for her. She was so tiny.
(the woes of time. people grow, things change, and they don't altogether.)
[It's an easy language, this. Too easy sometimes.]
I took over most of your operations, y'know. You wouldn't be saying that if you knew all the shit I do every day. I own more ties now than I ever wanted to, geez.
[He rolls his eyes. To say Chuuya was overworked was putting it gently, but he still managed to find time to relax, occasionally.
Chuuya pauses in the middle of his work at that small touch, whatever he was about to say dying in his throat at Dazai's quiet utterance of his name.] ...Dazai?
Eh, are you torturing now? That really doesn't suit you, Chuuya.
(torturing is a slow, slow business. requires patience, requires calmness he can't see chuuya having. chuuya's lively, like a flame that refuses to he put off, refuses to die down, so alive and couldn't take a life so slowly.
it's almost like he wants a break. almost overwhelming, underneath the stoic front he's putting forward. so, he sets a kiss to the other's nose, on the tip, as if he fully expected chuuya to yell at him while he works on unwrapping the other arm, sloth pace at it too.)
Of course I torture, y'think I didn't get an education in that shit?
[And gravity manipulation can be extremely useful for the more... creative methods Chuuya can use. It's certainly not his favorite task, but he's always had enough of a sadistic streak to make it work.
The easy touch, the easy banter. It's all so easy to fall into this with Dazai, as if it's just the aftermath of another bad day or a bad mission. The kiss is new, and certainly startling from the look on Chuuya's face, but he seems to take it in stride, aside from the faint hint of heat in his cheeks.] If you're trying to distract me from what I'm doing, it ain't gonna work.
[They hadn't talked about it. Chuuya had become rather certain they wouldn't acknowledge it, in any way.]
Naturally you did, but still I think it's not something that suits you.
(he doesn't contest that chuuya might be actually good at it. a twist here, a compression there, gravity manipulation is such a wonderful gift when creativity jumps in. he just thinks it's not an activity suited for chuuya.
drop him on a war with a bag of bullets, let him have at it, that's much more his style, and what dazai would have liked to see the most.
reason why he's being obnoxious, though? the other arm is far worse. it'll hurt more, there's more to be seen. he can't help the little smile on his lips, though, with those blushed cheeks.
Well i am an executive. [It’s not a denial because Chuuya knows he’s right: it’s doesn’t suit him, not really. He’s someone best suited for the heat of battle, acting and thinking on his feet. But it’s the job, and the job requires more than he’s suited for and sometimes things he didn’t enjoy.
Chuuya has a feeling Dazai is trying to distract him now, though. He scowls up at him, cheeks heating more at being called out.]
People get red in the face when they’re irritated too, asswipe. And you’re an expert at being an irritant.
(he's trying to distract both, to be honest. just removing the bandages is work in itself, both psychological and physical with the pressure change against wounds, and ah, chuuya. you're giving it to him too easily! there's even a hint of genuine on the corners of his empty smile.
don't think about the way the breeze hits his bare skin. look at chuuya.)
I decided that, for a limited time only, I like it. I'm going to be extra irritant from now on, until I'm normal irritant. I should bite them!
You’re biting people now? Always knew you were a dog.
[It’s said with an eye roll as he ties off the last stitch, nice and neat. A bit of medical cream follows, gently soothed over the cuts and hopefully dulling any pain left behind.]
I'm the one who won the bet, so you'll be forever the dog, regardless of what you call me.
(it's sore. it helps, even if he can't see it right now, being bitchy as he is. but, hey, he's almost done unwrapping the other arm, and he wants to postpone chuuya looking at it as much as he could-- so, a bite, to the red cheek.)
You cheated at that bet, you mean. I ain’t nobody’s dog!
[There are arguments to be made that Chuuya is as loyal as any dog, but he’ll get growly if that gets pointed out.
Not that Dazai biting his cheek gets a quiet reaction. The strangled noise chuuya makes is one part embarrassed, one part flustered, one part irritated. His cheeks only get redder.] Dazai!!
(the cheek is still between his teeth, although barely bitten, just there as his mouth moves awkwardly to get those words out.
there, the other arm is out. and it feels like he gained a few more minutes of chuuya not looking at it, even if dazai's cooperating as much as he can.)
(he can refuse to acknowledge all he wants. it does still happen, and it freezes dazai a little bit, now this time he's the one who's surprised, perhaps even the tiniest amount of blush on his cheeks.
acknowledge this or the scars? error. ERROR. 404.
here. he's shoving his other arm on chuuya's chest.)
[It sure does happen, and all of the whining and dog jokes Chuuya expected in response to the bite don't even come. Instead, Dazai is... Dazai is blushing, and poor Chuuya's brain is having a malfunction over the sight.
Fucking hell the last word he should be associating with Dazai is 'cute'!! Chuuya's face is turning bright red, and the only response he can manage is taking Dazai's arm with a sputter.] Yeah, and I would have won then, too!
(he did want both of them to be uncomfortable, so he didn't have to suffer alone, but now he's double uncomfortable, and chuuya is only once uncomfortable, life isn't fair, woe is him, die chuuya, fuck you, etc, the list of swears go on in his brain.
IT'S NOT FAIR!! here, have the arm, have everything, shut up, he has to pull through this and have a good nice revenge, he can't have this on the air like that.)
If you want to kiss me, Chuuya, you can just say so! I don't blame you! I'm very good at these things!
[Sometimes Dazai plans don't go as planned and things like This happen, because Chuuya is Chuuya and a storm of a human being in every way. Chuuya grabs for the medical alcohol and gauze again, snarling to cover up the fact that he feels like combusting from embarrassment.]
I bit you, I didn't kiss you! You sure you're not the one projecting here, mackerel?!
[He wets the gauze and finally looks down at Dazai's arm. At least they're both pretty off kilter now?]
(this is going to hurt like a thousand stings, he can sense it before the gauze even comes close, and what wouldn't he do to avoid this, postpone it, even if it will hurt more.
his eyes close, almost too tight, as he waits, such a damn baby, and he lets it out in one breath.)
[And without warning, Chuuya's swiping the medical alcohol soaked gauze over the cuts, carefully cleaning away any blood and dirt trapped in them. Dazai can hiss and whine, but this will get done, damn it.
Wait a second--] Wait-- What the fuck?!
[And now he's pausing as his brain finally processes what Dazai just babbled. With the alcohol soaked pad still on Dazai's arm, baffled and blushing.
Dazai should probably not distract him if he doesn't want this to hurt worse, unfortunately.]
(the eyes closed didn't help at all with withstanding the pain, they squeeze even further, his foot tapping upon first contact with the damn alcohol, it stings, it hurts, it's not comfortable, holy fuck, he's never been so uncomfortable in his life.
and then chuuya just keeps it there. it hurts even more with the liquid dripping into his cut, and he just sinks teeth on chuuya's shoulder, letting out a noise as if it's really The Worst Pain Ever Endured By A Human Being.)
Why are you so slow at this!!!! Let's give up!!! Let's just leave me to die!!!!! Ouch, ouch.
(muffled by the way his teeth are not letting go.)
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cw self-harm and stitching
a moment to stare at his own hand, where the wrapping ends and begins, before he sighs. chuuya's seen bits and pieces, but it's been years. even living together doesn't grant him a glimpse. it's worse than he remembers, dazai knows for a fact, but he'll slowly undo the first rolls until the end of his forearm. the cuts are there, some superficial, some deeper than they should, but none fatal, certainly.
just stitch it. he'll remove the others in the bathroom when he needs to bath. he's definitely not looking, though. his eyes fall anywhere else.)
Re: cw self-harm and stitching
Dazai's reluctance is obvious, but as he starts to unroll the bandages Chuuya knows he's giving that permission without words. So while he does that Chuuya will reach for the first aid kit in his bag, pulling it out and locating the medical alcohol and some gauze, giving Dazai time to unwrap himself while he gets set with that.] Y'know, did I ever tell you that Ane-san got on my ass for my stitching, once? I knew how to do it before we met, but she told me my technique was garbage when she saw how I did it. She insisted on teaching me how to do it 'neatly'.
[It is worse than he remembers... but Dazai is still breathing, which is a victory in and of itself in Chuuya's opinion. He takes Dazai's arm carefully in hand, running an alcohol soaked piece of gauze over the various cuts, taking extra care with the deeper ones to make sure there's nothing caught in there. There's no taking away the sting, but Chuuya is gentle, and gentler still when he disinfects the needle and sets about stitching. Quickly and carefully. He chatters all the while, first telling Dazai about the 'sewing lessons' he'd gotten from Kouyou that involved cloth rather than skin, including one stupid attempt where he'd managed to sew a pair of gloves together.]
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he can, however, take notice that while chuuya can't stop it from hurting all together, he's doing his best to make it the most comfortable he can for someone so uncomfortable like dazai is right now. the chatter is welcome, and it even draws a snort from him.)
You know, I've always been jealous. She's so elegant. But no, I was stuck with Mori and Elise. Elise has her weird moods. Ugh, ew.
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Ha! I'm pretty sure Kouyou nabbed me up because I didn't have a damn clue about how to talk business and was liable to fuck things up quick without her kind of training. I was the furthest thing from elegant.
[Training a street gang kid into a mafioso was a Job, probably.]
Eh, Elise ain't that bad if you humor her. Not quite sure why an ability wants to eat so many sweets though.
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(because damn, you still talk like a delinquent, chuuya. those r's rolling, the slangs, ah, kyouyou tried her best. there's a moment there he sucks teeth, because fucking hell, it hurts. why didn't he nab morphine from the streets. damn, past dazai.)
I usually just poked her.
(poof. bye, felicia.)
That time I was captured, it felt like nothing had changed at all? I even had small talk with some people. Sato-san's kids are all grown-up now... That long went by, huh?
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[Chuuya lets out a snort at that bit about kouyou though.] Mad? You’re still breathing and you still have all your parts. Not sure what you’re complaining about.
[the word Chuuya would use was ‘heartsick’ personally. Others might not
acknowledge it, but Kouyou had chosen to give her blessing for kyouka’s new life in the light. That didn’t mean it didn’t hurt her to see the child she cared so much for go somewhere beyond her reach to find her happiness.]
I’d say i’m disappointed in our security, but it is you. Did he tell you his daughter wants to become a pediatrician? he’ll talk anyone’s ear off about it, the man’s so damn proud.
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(it's just so much easier to let out the insults, although they're half-hearted, he's not even trying, he's not even looking at chuuya right now. even the hand the moves some hair to tuck behind his ear is instinctual like he just knows where chuuya is, without even needing to look.
the curse. the damn curse.)
Ah, no, he didn't have time. Look at that... That's very nice for her. She was so tiny.
(the woes of time. people grow, things change, and they don't altogether.)
... Chuuya.
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I took over most of your operations, y'know. You wouldn't be saying that if you knew all the shit I do every day. I own more ties now than I ever wanted to, geez.
[He rolls his eyes. To say Chuuya was overworked was putting it gently, but he still managed to find time to relax, occasionally.
Chuuya pauses in the middle of his work at that small touch, whatever he was about to say dying in his throat at Dazai's quiet utterance of his name.] ...Dazai?
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(torturing is a slow, slow business. requires patience, requires calmness he can't see chuuya having. chuuya's lively, like a flame that refuses to he put off, refuses to die down, so alive and couldn't take a life so slowly.
it's almost like he wants a break. almost overwhelming, underneath the stoic front he's putting forward. so, he sets a kiss to the other's nose, on the tip, as if he fully expected chuuya to yell at him while he works on unwrapping the other arm, sloth pace at it too.)
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[And gravity manipulation can be extremely useful for the more... creative methods Chuuya can use. It's certainly not his favorite task, but he's always had enough of a sadistic streak to make it work.
The easy touch, the easy banter. It's all so easy to fall into this with Dazai, as if it's just the aftermath of another bad day or a bad mission. The kiss is new, and certainly startling from the look on Chuuya's face, but he seems to take it in stride, aside from the faint hint of heat in his cheeks.] If you're trying to distract me from what I'm doing, it ain't gonna work.
[They hadn't talked about it. Chuuya had become rather certain they wouldn't acknowledge it, in any way.]
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(he doesn't contest that chuuya might be actually good at it. a twist here, a compression there, gravity manipulation is such a wonderful gift when creativity jumps in. he just thinks it's not an activity suited for chuuya.
drop him on a war with a bag of bullets, let him have at it, that's much more his style, and what dazai would have liked to see the most.
reason why he's being obnoxious, though? the other arm is far worse. it'll hurt more, there's more to be seen. he can't help the little smile on his lips, though, with those blushed cheeks.
he's so on chuuya's face, though.)
Blushing, though.
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Chuuya has a feeling Dazai is trying to distract him now, though. He scowls up at him, cheeks heating more at being called out.]
People get red in the face when they’re irritated too, asswipe. And you’re an expert at being an irritant.
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don't think about the way the breeze hits his bare skin. look at chuuya.)
I decided that, for a limited time only, I like it. I'm going to be extra irritant from now on, until I'm normal irritant. I should bite them!
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[It’s said with an eye roll as he ties off the last stitch, nice and neat. A bit of medical cream follows, gently soothed over the cuts and hopefully dulling any pain left behind.]
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(it's sore. it helps, even if he can't see it right now, being bitchy as he is. but, hey, he's almost done unwrapping the other arm, and he wants to postpone chuuya looking at it as much as he could-- so, a bite, to the red cheek.)
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[There are arguments to be made that Chuuya is as loyal as any dog, but he’ll get growly if that gets pointed out.
Not that Dazai biting his cheek gets a quiet reaction. The strangled noise chuuya makes is one part embarrassed, one part flustered, one part irritated. His cheeks only get redder.] Dazai!!
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(the cheek is still between his teeth, although barely bitten, just there as his mouth moves awkwardly to get those words out.
there, the other arm is out. and it feels like he gained a few more minutes of chuuya not looking at it, even if dazai's cooperating as much as he can.)
Yes?
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[and is Dazai trying to eat him now??? regardless, Chuuya tilts his head to the side to bite Dazai’s nose in return, lightly.
That their lips barely brush in the process is something he is going to refuse to acknowledge.]
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(he can refuse to acknowledge all he wants. it does still happen, and it freezes dazai a little bit, now this time he's the one who's surprised, perhaps even the tiniest amount of blush on his cheeks.
acknowledge this or the scars? error. ERROR. 404.
here. he's shoving his other arm on chuuya's chest.)
YOU WIN.
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Fucking hell the last word he should be associating with Dazai is 'cute'!! Chuuya's face is turning bright red, and the only response he can manage is taking Dazai's arm with a sputter.] Yeah, and I would have won then, too!
[#maturity.]
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IT'S NOT FAIR!! here, have the arm, have everything, shut up, he has to pull through this and have a good nice revenge, he can't have this on the air like that.)
If you want to kiss me, Chuuya, you can just say so! I don't blame you! I'm very good at these things!
(THERE. IT'S ALL CHUUYA'S FAULT. #maturity.)
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I bit you, I didn't kiss you! You sure you're not the one projecting here, mackerel?!
[He wets the gauze and finally looks down at Dazai's arm. At least they're both pretty off kilter now?]
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his eyes close, almost too tight, as he waits, such a damn baby, and he lets it out in one breath.)
ObviouslyIwanttokissyouweshoulddefinitelydoitrightnowbeforeyoutorturememerciless.
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[And without warning, Chuuya's swiping the medical alcohol soaked gauze over the cuts, carefully cleaning away any blood and dirt trapped in them. Dazai can hiss and whine, but this will get done, damn it.
Wait a second--] Wait-- What the fuck?!
[And now he's pausing as his brain finally processes what Dazai just babbled. With the alcohol soaked pad still on Dazai's arm, baffled and blushing.
Dazai should probably not distract him if he doesn't want this to hurt worse, unfortunately.]
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and then chuuya just keeps it there. it hurts even more with the liquid dripping into his cut, and he just sinks teeth on chuuya's shoulder, letting out a noise as if it's really The Worst Pain Ever Endured By A Human Being.)
Why are you so slow at this!!!! Let's give up!!! Let's just leave me to die!!!!! Ouch, ouch.
(muffled by the way his teeth are not letting go.)
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